Friday 13 February 2015

Why is "X" a Kiss?

By Elizabeth King

When I was a little girl, my grandmother used to send me mail by post, as she lived about 4 hours away from my family and long distance telephone calls were expensive (this is pre-long distance phone plan days my friends). Getting mail was a thrill for me - I absolutely loved it. I was a devoted letter writer to childhood friends, signed up for every program at school and the public library that created pen-pal connections, and wrote to everyone I could, including the Queen of England (who in my childhood mind would just relish receiving letters from someone who had the same name as her, because obviously that meant we should be friends). When I got something back it was like Christmas, my Birthday, the Tooth Fairy AND a surprise, all sealed up in a neat little package.

My grandmother’s letters were always something extra special. She had a knack for including the best stickers, the coolest bookmarks, or sometimes a fun little clipping from a newspaper. She always signed her letters, “Love, Nana XOXO.”

I remember that it was my mother who first told me what “XOXO” meant. “Kisses and hugs,” she said, but I never dug any deeper than that, which, let me tell you, is not typical of me. Even at 6 years old I wanted to not only know the “how” of something, but the why, when, where, who…repeat, ad nauseam, etc. I don’t know why I let this one go…but I did.

One year, when I was about 8 or 9 years old, along with a Valentine’s Day card, my granny included an article that she had snipped out of a Reader’s Digest magazine that explained why people used “X” to symbolize a kiss. To this day, I think about that article EVERY time I put an “X” on something. I think it’s because at the time I thought I had hit jackpot, and that I was now privy to the meaning behind this mystical, clandestine, code - no one else would know this! I felt special. Do you want to know a secret though? I think my inner child still does this cheeky little snicker about knowing the meaning of the “X” to this day because the thing is, not many people do know why “X” is a kiss. They put it on cards, letters, and gifts, without truly understanding the meaning. Well, in the spirit of childhood memories and the days of learning to share, I am going to let you in on the reason that “X” is a kiss.

Back in the early Middle Ages, most common people did not know how to read and write. As a result of this, when they were signing a document, they would use a simple “X” to express their signature. Not only was this because it was easy to write, but also because it was similar to the symbol of the Christian cross which was used similarly, and which represented faith, blessings and honesty. Furthermore, as a sign of sincerity, they would kiss the “X” on the document, in oath of its earnestness. As a result of this historical practice, the “X” has trickled down through the history of writing, to be used colloquially as an endearing symbol of love, devotion and “kisses”, even by those who are literate.

“Why do our sweet sentimental young misses / In love letters make little crosses for kisses?” author unknown, 1893

Happy Valentine’s Day folks!



Elizabeth King is currently filling the role of Interim Assistant Manager at Lang Pioneer Village Museum.  She has been working at the Village since May of 2009.  Elizabeth is passionate about history, costuming, reading, vegan culinary crusades and environmental pursuits. When she isn’t in the middle of a project at Lang, she is often found with her head in the clouds.